Adolescence

I have an adolescent child. A boy, on the cusp of the teen years; Raging hormones, emotional roller coasters, girls, long showers,girls, endless hours spent in front of the mirror, combing hair, girls.

I don't know what happened to my sweet child, but a sullen alien has replaced him at my dinner table. I feel like I've embarked on a some kind of enemy territory. A foreign land. Both of us learning a new art form: One wanting independence, one learning to let go.

As parents, we've been taught for years how important it is to keep the lines of communication open from the beginning, so when our children grow and are faced with overwhelming obstacles and challenges, we are approachable. They feel comfortable talking to us when it really matters and the stakes are high.

"How was your day?"

"Fine"

"What did you have for lunch?"

"I don't remember"

"What do you have for homework tonight?"

"Why are you asking me so many questions?"

This conversation leaves me wondering:

How can I do this better? 

Will he come to me in regards to girls and drugs when he won't even tell me what he had for lunch?

Then, it happens...When I least expect it. We're getting in the car, heading to a school event, just the two of us. The two car doors slam in unison. 

"Thank God we're alone! I need to talk to you about...."

I try not to appear too giddy. I don't want him to think I care too much. I don't want to appear needy. I try not to talk too much. Just Listen...Just Listen....Just Listen....I keep chanting to myself. 

For the full 10 minute car ride, we had this deep and meaningful conversation in the darkness of our car, the dash lights reflecting off his face. 

During this time of "Boy Becomes Man", when nothing I do feels right, I had a moment. Just a sliver of time where it felt like maybe....just maybe....all my effort and time invested might pay off.